Nature Calls, and Seems Upset

Today I give you this...there are simply just not enough words to describe this video. It is astounding on way too many levels, so enjoy it and remember to think twice before harming that little twig in your yard, it has feelings, too, apparently.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElJFYwRtrH4

The REAL Spiderman

Let’s get a couple things straight about this picture before I dive into the usual sarcastic ranting. First, have a close look and you will see that this man is not attached in any way to the building; just some good ole fashioned free climbing. Second, notice how high he is compared to the skyline. That’s because Alain Robert only climbs the highest buildings in the city.

In his lifetime, which will no doubt fall a bit below the average life span, Alain has climbed over 70 skyscrapers and monuments…WITH ONLY HIS BARE HANDS!! That’s right, no ropes or safety equipment whatsoever! Some notable mentions include the Sears Tower, Petronas Twin Towers and, to a group of 100,000 spectators, the National Bank of Adu Dhabi. Some people are missing various inhibitory mechanisms in their brain…others are just missing their brain entirely. Next time you are criticized for doing something “dangerous” or “crazy”, just remind your critic what “crazy” truly is.

Breakthrough Riding Mower Technology

Despite decades of dedicated research and development by many prestigious companies such as John Deere and Toro, it was two young backwoods developers who inaugurated the best new riding mower technology to date. Think about all of the great benefits displayed by these scholars: you can far exceed speeds of a normal riding lawnmower; you have a buddy with you at all times so as to avoid the dreaded “lonely mow”; if you get tired of cutting the grass you can just ride off to do some 4 wheelin’. There are many more clear advantages to this new machine but I’ll let you use your imagination.

Just remember, next time you think you don’t have something – like a riding mower – turn that frown upside down because you can always consult the rednecks of the world to come up with something genius.

The Public Sink (must be 18 or older)

Once again, China amazes us with its best creative minds as depicted here in this rather brash sink design. I can just picture it now, walking around the corner to wash your hands after using the bathroom to meet your naked, half-bodied female…sink. Yes, in fact, this is an actual PUBLIC sink which brings to mind a few questions:

1. Was this actually commissioned by the public?
2. Was it approved prior to its inaugural hand washing experience?
3. Do they have smaller, dare I say, “kid-friendly” versions?
4. I wonder if the engineers were male or female…okay, yeah, they had to be male.

So hats off to you, oh mighty and slightly perverted plumbing engineer – may you continue to shock the public with your outside of the box thinking.

The New High Roller

So you’re asking yourself, what is the newest and most advanced mode of transportation and how to I get my hands on it? Look no further than the cutting edge technology manifested in this remarkable Indian transportation specimen. It is well equipped with a powerful engine (that has been removed and replaced by an under-fed farm animal), a lovely baby blue passenger compartment (that is technically a double-decker due to the cozy driver’s compartment underneath) as well as the fuel efficiency and stability afforded by having only two wheels instead of the over rated four wheel setup.

Looking to impress your friends with your next ride? I can only image that this fine (vehicle?) will cost well into the hundreds of thousands but official numbers are not out as of yet. My best guess is that the personal cheerful chauffeur will cost extra.